Now don’t let my opening statement make you nervous or worried (any more than you already are). The point that I will be making here is that with the proper planning and forethought, you can pick the BEST song for BOTH of you.
Pick The Song Together
The most important factor that should be decided FIRST is “does this song have meaning to US”. When working with my clients I always stress the importance of making this decision together. Start by writing down all the songs that have meaning to each of you, then compare your list. Now you may not have the same song on both of your lists, but that’s ok. By reviewing your list, it will bring each of you closer to finding the perfect song. If you get stuck for ideas, click here to see a list of the more popular songs being chosen by brides today. You may not find YOUR song here, but it might help you decide on a favorite artist or style of music and then you can work together to narrow down your choices.
Ask Yourself “Can I Dance To This”
After you have picked your song, you need to make sure that you can BOTH dance to it. It’s better to find out now that the song you have chosen does not fit one or both of your dancing styles than on the day of your wedding. Play the song and try dancing to it in your living room. If you find it difficult to comfortably dance to your song you have two options. If the song you chose HAS to be your first dance song, then find a dance instructor and sign up for a few professional lessons to help you get comfortable. With only a few lessons you could be dancing like Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire. Your other option is to chose another song. If this is the case, don’t get upset. Rather, embrace the challenge and start the process over again. The extra time you put into this now will pay off later I promise.
Your first dance is a great time to let your personalities shine. If your family and friends have come to expect the unexpected from you, then don’t disappoint them now. Take the time to create a dance “routine” that expresses your personalities. Ask your bridal party or family members to join in on the fun. Just this past month I performed at a wedding where the bride and groom incorporated Irish step dancing into their first dance. The entire venue was on their feet and it set the tone for the rest of the night.
This point cannot be stressed enough. No matter if you have chosen a romantic song to dance together to or you went the more adventurous direction, you need to practice. With all of the planning and thought that has gone into your special day, don’t let your first dance fall through the cracks. I know from talking with my clients, that the idea of adding “one more thing” to their list of things to do could make them scream, but I encourage you to take even a few hours to practice your first dance.
Listen To The Lyrics
Couples often choose their favorite song, and forget to think about the lyrics. Just because a song “sounds” like a love song does not mean that it is. Here is just one example of what I am talking about. The song “Every Breath You Take” by the police has been used as a first dance song since it’s release in 1983. What’s interesting is that in an interview with Rolling Stone, Sting said “the relationship it’s lyrics describe is hardly a healthy one”. ”I consider it a fairly nasty song,” he said. “It’s about surveillance and ownership and jealousy.” In other words, when he croons, “I’ll be watching you,” he means it in the literal sense.
No two weddings are ever the same. Even weddings held in the same venue on the same day have completely different feels. Every aspect of your planning has been about your personal tastes. From your wedding dress, the venue, the food, the flowers and the music. Work with your wedding DJ to find the best song to fit your personalities and I promise your first dance will be as special as you had hoped it would be.
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